“The Eleventh Hour” quotes from Doctor Who

If you're a doctor, then why does your box say "police"? [She gives him the apple. He bites it and spits it out.]

That's disgusting. What is that?

An apple.

Apple's rubbish. I hate apples.

You said you loved them.

No, no, no. I love yoghurt. Yoghurt's my favorite. Give me yoghurt. [Amelia runs, retrieves yoghurt and hands it to him. The Doctor opens it, gulps it down, then spits it out] I hate yoghurt! Just stuff with bits in it.

You said that it was your favorite!

New mouth, new rules. It's like eating after cleaning your teeth. Everything tastes wrooong! Ahh! [he convulses]

What is it? What's wrong with you?

Wrong with me? It's not my fault. Why can't you give me any decent food? You're Scottish. Fry something! [Amelia turns on the stove and cooks.] Ahh, bacon. [Eats it and spits it out] Bacon. That's bacon. Are you trying to poison me? [Amelia cooking baked beans.] Ah, you see? Beans. [Eats then spits in sink.] Beans are evil! Bad, bad beans! [Amelia spreading butter on bread, looking sceptical] Bread and butter. [Smiling] Now you're talking. [The Doctor throws the plate of bread and butter out of the door like a Frisbee, cat howls, dog barks] And stay out!

Got some carrots...

Carrots?! Are you insane?! No, wait, hang on. I know what I need. [Searching the fridge] I need... I need... I need... [pulls out a box of fish fingers] fish fingers [takes out a carton of custard] and custard!

So what about your mum and dad, then? Are they upstairs? I thought we'd have woken them by now.

I don't have a mum and dad, just an aunt.

I don't even have an aunt.

You're lucky.

I know. [An awkward pause] So your aunt, where's she?

She's out.

Has she left you all alone?!

I'm not scared!

Of course you're not! You're not scared of anything! Box falls out of the sky, man falls out of the box, man eats fish custard, and look at you! Just sitting there! So you know what I think?

[shrugging] What?

Must be one hell of a scary crack in your wall.

Why did you say six months?

[watching Prisoner Zero] He’s coming. We gotta go.

This matters - this is important! Why did you say six months?

[full on Scottish accent] WELL, WHY DID YOU SAY "FIVE MINUTES"?!

What...?

Come on!

What?!

[grabbing him] COME ON!!

WHAT?!

You're Amelia!

You're late!

Amelia Pond! You're the little girl!

I'm Amelia, and you're late.

What happened?

Twelve years!

You hit me with a cricket bat!

Ha! Twelve years!

A cricket bat!

Twelve years, and four psychiatrists!

Four?

I kept biting them!

Why?

They said you weren't real.

[looking at Prisoner Zero, which is disguised as him] Well, that's rubbish. Who's that supposed to be?

It's you.

Me? Is that what I look like?

You don't know?

Busy day.

Is this world a threat to the Atraxi? Well, go on, you're monitoring the whole planet. Is this world a threat?

[does a quick scan of life on Earth] No.

Are the peoples of this world guilty of any crimes punishable by the laws of the Atraxi?

[scans through multiple historical atrocities] No.

Okay. One question, just one more: Is this world protected?

You're not the first lot to have come here. Oh, there have been so many. But the real question you have to ask yourself is...what happened to them?

Hello. I'm the Doctor. Basically... Run.

It's you. You came back.

'Course I came back, I always come back. Something wrong with that?

And you kept the clothes.

Well, I just saved the world, the whole planet, for about the millionth time, no charge. Yeah, shoot me! I kept the clothes.

Including the bow tie.

[self-conscious] Yeah, it's cool. Bow ties are cool. [fixes it]

Are you from another planet?

Yeah.

...'Kay.

So, what do you think?

What?

Other planets, wanna check some out?

What does that mean?

It means... well... it means... come with me.

[sharp] Where?

Wherever you like.

All that stuff that happened, the hospital, the spaceships, Prisoner Zero...

Oh, don't worry, that's just the beginning. There's loads more.

Yeah, but those things, those amazing things, all that stuff... [pause, deep breath, then, angrily] That was TWO. YEARS. AGO!

Oh... [weak chuckle] Oops.

Yeah!

So that's--

Fourteen years!

Fourteen years since fish custard! Amy Pond, the girl who waited. You've waited long enough.

When I was a kid, you said there was a swimming pool and a library, and the swimming pool was in the library.

Yeah, not sure where it's got to now. It'll turn up. So, coming?

No.

You wanted to come fourteen years ago.

I grew up.

Don't worry, I'll soon fix that.