Mr. Wong, you're under arrest.
“Unfinished Business” · Season 1, Episode 15
In this episode: Dean Winchester (940), Damon Salvatore (715), Sam Winchester (665), Olivia Benson (637), Stephen Fry (608), Narrator (554), Clark Kent (523), Nate (486)
[as Jade plays a video game in her seat]
Jade, pay attention.
[Jade groans as Uncle takes away her game, then Uncle notices Jackie working]
Uh, I am multi-tasking.
[Uncle takes away his notepad] Now you are one-tasking!
[to Jackie and Tohru] So you think Uncle's old friend calls him "Uncle" too?
WWing
[to Uncle] Chuckles, is that you?
JTJackie, Tohru, and Jade
[to each other] Huh?? Chuckles??
Beetlebrow!
WWing
So, you remember your nickname
Ha ha ha! Who can forget those fuzzy caterpillars living over your eyes?
WWing
And your never-ending pranks and gift of laughter.
[turning to Jackie} Is he talking
WWing
So, you have come to
[the background actors exchange slight bows with Uncle out of respect]
And to introduce my family to you. My nephew Jackie...
WWing
Ah, yes. Butterfingers.
Uh, hello. I have heard so much about you. I am sorry I have to run. I am mounting an exhibit at the pacific Asia museum. Uh... Bye-bye. [he rushes off]
Please excuse his manners. And this is my apprentice Tohru.
[playing handheld video game which pings] Hehe. [clears thoat] This alarm tells me I must tend to the shop now. A pleasure meeting you. [waves goodbye before rushing off]
And last, but not least, my great-niece Jade.
WWing
I will always wish the opera had kept you, my friend.
That is my cue to say goodbye. [Uncle starts to leave, then stops and turns around] One more thing, I hope it will not be another 60 years before we meet again, Beetlebrow.
WWing
As do I, Chuckles.
Not the stairs!
Chang has two hands, because that is not really Chang. It is his magical duplicate!
You mean, we're dealing with clones?!
Aiya! Who said anything about clowns?! We are facing forces more powerful than the circus!
Duplicates are imperfect. They contain flaws, like Chang's extra hand, but each is more powerful than its human counterpart due to its magic.
Aw, we can take them Unc. We'll face off in the epic battle royale! Human vs clone, good vs evil, Jade vs Jade!
You missed Uncle's point! Magic must defeat magic!
["Jackie" enters the room]
Look who decided to show.
JCJackie Clone
Sorry I am late.
Now, one more thing. We must be very watchful for these defective duplicates.
[Jackie enters the room in a rush]
Uncle, we must watch out for-
It is Jackie's Clone!
What?! [sees his clone] No! Wait! [is tackled by the J-Team] I am me! He is not me!
JCJackie Clone
Tricky clone, isn't he?
Which is the real Jackie Chan?
I have a little quiz only the real Jackie could answer. Jackie, when is my birthday?
JJJackie and Jackie Clone
Oh... uh...
[bummed out] Jackie, I thought we were pretty good friends...
Ahem. Hey Jackie, will you take me to Moose World this weekend?
JCJackie Clone
Of course!
-not! You have homework!
[points to the clone] There's your clone.
[pause; Jackie's clone kicks the door down and runs off]
JCJackie Clone
Sorry, I'll be back to destroy you later, thank you!
[when Paco's clone is revealed] Paco has a clone and I don't?! Way unfair!
We are in great danger!
Paco, please! Say it is not so!
PCPaco Clone
But it is! And now, I will destroy you all. MWAHAHAHA!
Dullsville.
No, the capital of Georgia is Atlanta. Jade, you're geography test is tomorrow. Let's try Oregon.
Why does Tohru get to study the fun stuff?!
My tattoo just have to be gnarrled.
Yes! [Jackie catches her]
50 states, 50 capitals.
[Groaning]
Hi, Jackie.
Wah!
Before you get mad, listen. The capital of Kansas is Kansas city.
The capital is Topeka and that is not the point!
Uh, oh. [Stares at Tarakudo] Whoa.
You. [Recognizes Jade] Ah, the former queen of the ShadowKhan returning to the forces of darkness. [Jackie swoops up Jade]
Thank you, no. Not today!
Er... What Jackie said.
Let me guess. Mr. Creepyhead?
[Gasps] Jade, you're suppose to be with Captain Black!
Thought I should be here in case you fall another plane.
And what do they want with these disobedient children? [Jade sticks her tongue and raspberry him]
Feh. Floating head cannot be oni!
It can't?
Of course not! Everyone who has control the ShadowKhan has been Chinese! Shendu, Chinese! Daolon Wong, Chinese but oni are Japanese. [Uncle hears the beeping sound coming from Jackie's laptop]
Radar indicates Dark Hand jet has landed in Hong Kong.
See? Hong Kong, Chinese.
These quotes come from Wikiquote's Criminal Minds pages and are available under the Creative Commons Attribution-ShareAlike License.