“Unfinished Business” quotes from Criminal Minds

Mitch Mercer: What are you trying to do, make a monkey out of my client in front of his fans?

Carol McDermott: Only God can make a monkey, Mitch.

Elliot Robinson: [after Jessica exposes the murderer] I found the dynamite, and when I confronted Doris with it, she told me everything. She has this hate for Carol. Sick. Psychotic. She loved Brian, and then when Carol took him away, something snapped. She put that bomb in Carol's car, and then when Brian was killed in her place...

Sgt. Len Berger: Go on, Mr. Robinson.

Elliot Robinson: The next day, she went back to the house to find Carol, to finish the job. She took a knife from the kitchen and started up the stairs when she heard the front door start to open. She ducked into the closet and waited. Through the crack, she recognized Lieutenant Travis. She knew that if Travis found her there, he'd put everything together, so she stabbed him and ran out.

Jessica Fletcher: And when Carol came home, she caught a glimpse of Doris. A trick of light or her emotions made her think that it was Barbara.

Elliot Robinson: My only hope was to make you think Carol was crazy. I had no idea Barbara was really alive.

Jessica Fletcher: Where is Doris now?

Elliot Robinson: Home. I have a nurse with her. She's sedated. I know I should have told you, but I couldn't. You see, she's all I had left.

Congressman Brad Gardner: I don't think you should go pokin' around that club.

Rosalind Gardner: I was about to offer the same advice to you, darlin'.

Lloyd Marcus: Someday, Jessica, you and I will have a long talk about the joys of parenthood. In terms of gratification, it ranks right up there with molar extraction.

Donald Granger: [to Sabrina Marcus, after Jessica exposes him as the murderer] It was a million-dollar crapshoot, and I lost. Count your blessings, kid. It could have been you in that box.

Lt. Det. Barney Kale: [after Jessica accuses him of committing the murders] Lowell Dixon was a sanctimonious do-gooder. He caught me doing a few favors for the wrong people. I'd been operating like that for years. Nothing serious, you know. Just a little you-do-for-me, I-do-for-you. It got results, but it violated his Puritan sensibilities. He was gonna bring me up on charges. I would have been dismissed. And ten years ago, Mrs. Fletcher, I was not ready to be dismissed. Dixon was a very religious man. Always talking about getting to heaven. And I just simply helped him on his way.

Michael Hagarty: Jessica, you're as lovely as ever.

Jessica Fletcher: And you're as devious as ever.

Victoria Griffin: Mr. Kinkaid, you may own this agency, but you don't own me. You're the one who accepts all the fancy awards, but it's people like me and Aubrey and Phil Conklin, God rest his soul, who have always ground it out for you!

Aubrey Thornton: [after Jessia exposes him as the murderer] You think you've got it all planned, every little detail, and then you get suckered by one little mistake. He cheated me. He humiliated me. I sat in my office for months, trying to figure out how to get him. And it seemed like a perfect plan. He did not even look up. That arrogant, pompous phony. I wanted him to know that it was me. And, you know, killing him with the award, that wasn't improvisation. That was part of the plan. Nice touch, don't you think?

David Everett: [after Jessica invites him to stay in her guest room] The neighbors are liable to start talking.

Jessica Fletcher: Do you really think so? Good. They think I lead a very dull life, chained to my typewriter.

Bill Ainsley: [after Jessica exposes the murderer] Come on, this is crazy. Tell her!

Susan Ainsley: Tell her what? Bill, I'm sorry. She did call me. Crazy Alex. Drunk, scared and angry. Me, who she was always putting down. Well, I had no trouble finding her. And I was ready for her. And she was glad to see me. I couldn't just run her down. Suppose she lived through that? I had to be sure.

Jessica Fletcher: It wasn't enough to kill Alex. You tried to fix the blame on Coby. You knew if he was found guilty of killing Alex, he couldn't share in the treasure.

Susan Ainsley: You think that was it? You think the money was it? Well, let me tell you something. I was sick and tired of being the outsider. Bill was a diver. So they would accept Bill, no problem. But Alex kept harping on how the only thing I paid attention to was my looks. Well, my looks are the only thing that I have. I was never smart enough for them. And they kept throwing it back in my face.

Bill Ainsley: Honey, that's just not true.

Susan Ainsley: It is true, Bill. You just never paid any attention to it. To them, I was your airhead wife. Anyway, I went back to Hill House, and I located Coby's rental car. And then I made sure I was alone. And I took off my jacket, and I wrapped it around the tire iron to muffle the sound. And then I smashed the grill and the headlight. And then very carefully picked up every piece of glass, and I took it back with me to that dark, deserted road. Bill ... Bill, I didn't do it for me. I did it for us, baby. It was all right there for the taking, everything we ever wanted.

Jessica Fletcher: Seems you're always sailing away.

David Everett: I never said I was smart.