Cleveland, get yo' ass off the grass!!
“Unfinished Business” · Season 1, Episode 15
In this episode: Dean Winchester (940), Damon Salvatore (715), Sam Winchester (665), Olivia Benson (637), Stephen Fry (608), Narrator (554), Clark Kent (523), Nate (486)
[Cleveland gets a frozen cappuccino splashed in his face]
Aaaah! Frapp attack! You frapped me! She frapped me! I got frapp in my 'stache!!
You've been "Ralloed".
[shows a PowerPoint presentation during the scout tour meeting] Just look at that mass expand of virgin territory. The dense bushy thicket. And if you look close enough, you can see... my penis and testicles! [sees the picture Rallo took of him coming out of the shower] MY PENIS & TESTICLES!!??
Rallo, from now on, there will be no videogames, [Long Pause; ?] and no internet, no Angry Birds, no Angry Birds for Android, no Kindle, no Zoom, no Teo no Roku no Prondo no Switch no playpad no MIGO NO LICKSTER!!!
You know what, Donna, don't EVER DO THAT AGAIN, OR GIVE ME YOU'RE GROUNDED IN A WORD!
That's it! [quoting How Do You Solve a Problem Like Roberta?] I forbid you to have animal contact with this man!
Evening suckers. Anybody want to smell my flower?
EBEverybody but Donna
I do!
No! No more Rallo'ing, Rallo. Because you do not want to get Donna'ed.
[miserably] Been a while since I got Donna'ed.
How much you make in a year, fake cop?
OOfficer
$65,000.
[deep] Really?
Do you still serve grilled cheeses here?
WWorker
No – the campus banned trans fats.
[deep] Really?
So, does this mean you might wanna go to State?
State?! That Podunk school? Where I'm goin' is gonna cost WAY more than that.
Cleveland, Donna: [deep] Really?
Well, I'm off to sing about Jesus and crap.
VVanessa
When we get to North Carolina, I'm going to Tear. You. Two. Up.
Tear us up? I just wanted to smooch.
HHunter
Yeah. And I just wanted to take you to the soda fountain for a phosphate.
VVanessa
Ohh, is that like a Jewish sex thing? Because I heard you guys are really kinky.
HHunter
Not true. At all.
VVanessa
Get ready, boys. Because when I'm done with you. You will both. See. God.
Is he fucking kidding with this?
[whispers] Don't say "fuck" in church.
Mom!!!
[brandishing a bat] You havin' a nightmare?
No. But–what were you gonna do— Never mind. Check it out. [touches "The Eliminator" line with a ruler] The day is here. I'm tall enough to ride The Eliminator, the scariest roller coaster there is.
Fine. We'll go to Crazy Kingdom this weekend. [Rallo hugs her by the legs] Now I gotta get back before Cleveland realizes I'm not in bed.
[off-screen] Donna? DONNA! I'm trapped inside the duvet cover!
Ohh – here comes old Dixie!
RRRAGHHHH! Uncaring bastards!
These quotes come from Wikiquote's Criminal Minds pages and are available under the Creative Commons Attribution-ShareAlike License.