“Unfinished Business” quotes from Criminal Minds

Linda

That didn't happen to you.

Bob

Yes it did.

Linda

No. It happened to Tippi Hedren in The Birds.

Bob

What?

Teddy

Bob, you're describing an exact scene in Alfred Hitchcock's The Birds. They call it "shot for shot".

Linda

Bob, you think you're Tippi Hedren, honey.

Bob

I don't think I'm Tippi Hedren, I'm describing an event from my life.

Bob

Oh my God, I'm Tippi Hedren!

Teddy

Yeah, you wish!

Bob

I guess I must have seen that movie when I was young.

Linda

Oh, you poor thing. You poor dumb thing.

Tina

Kissing is one of the great parts of life, like dancing. Or rainy days. Or those croissants Meryl Streep made in that movie. We don't have to not kiss. We just have to smart kiss... and now, I am going to kiss everyone in this row.

A mob hit? No fair! How'd you get something cool?

Gene

Well...bye, Jimmy.

Wait wait wait, I love mob stuff! The music, the movies..."Johnny Dangerously." Joe Piscopo in his prime! That's the movie that made me wanna be Italian!

Bob

You do not want that flu bug. I had it and it gave me weird fever dreams. I dreamt I was in a book club with my cousin Vanessa,

Bob

Tina, I thought we took the air horn away from you.

Tina

Did you hide it in your underwear drawer?

Gene

Yes.

Tina

We know about the underwear drawer.

Gene

And about your underwear. Not-so-tighty-not-so-whitey!

Bob

[Linda's voice] So listen, none shall pass... gas, Oh, Just kidding.

Teddy

You know that boat that I've been fixing up?

Louise

Yoooou've mentioned it.

Teddy

Well, I finally got her shipshape, and I thought it'd be fun to take you all out.

Louise

Kill us?

Teddy

No, take you out for a boat ride.

Ugggh! You've been a witch for what? Two days? Take it down a notch! You're playing with powerful forces; this is not kids stuff.

Tina

I am powerful forces.

Witch, please!

Notice anything different about me?

Tina

No, thank you.

Eh? Eh? I'm tan! Just got back from a week in the Bahamas. We had a blast. Except for Jimmy Jr. He forgot to put on sunblock. Now he looks like a dog's ding-dong.

Tina

Aw!

Bob

We should build a fort with the cushions.That way, even if he gets in, he won't see us.

Okay, but I'm still sad, so I want my own room in the fort to reflect and figure out where to go from here.

Bob

You absolutely deserve that.

Louise Belcher

How you doing girl?

Tina Belcher

Um, not great. I feel like my soul has diarrhea.

Bob

Maybe we should just pack it in. Go home and drink the kind of hot coco

Mr. Frond

They're looking for a student to participate in their Robotic Mobility Program. Or rump for short.

Tina

Rump? I'm listening.

Tinabot, commence to the AV closet. I want to show you something. It's something I haven't shown anyone. Not even Zeke.

Tina

Wow, a secret, and a zekeret.

Sorry ballroom's been cancelled. The teacher just waltzed out of here. Get it? I'm kidding. She died.