Dean Craig Pelton in “Pilot”

[Giving a public speech to welcome new students at Greendale Community College] Uh... good morning! Uh, many of you are halfway through your first week here at Greendale and, as your Dean, I thought I would share a few thoughts of wisdom and inspiration. [reading from his notes] What is community college? Well, you've heard all kinds of things. You've heard it's "loser" college for remedial teens, 20-something dropouts, middle-aged divorcees and old people keeping their minds active as they circle the drain of eternity. That's what you've heard; however, I wish you luck! [Awkward silence] Okay, you know - uh oh. There's more to this speech, so there's actually a middle card that is missing, can we all look around our immediate areas? 'Cause I really wanted to...