[V.O.] The interior locks in an office suite are usually low-end; just there to keep white-collar workers from stealing coffee cups. File cabinet locking bars, on the other hand, are a more serious security measure. Their main vulnerability is that they depend on people's faith in padlocks. People have too much faith in padlocks.
All S1
S1 E15Unfinished Business
Uh, Sam, didn't you forget something? [Madeline hands him a number of bullets] I found them in your pants. I heard them rattling around in the washing machine when I was doing your laundry.
Yeah, 9 mm. Uh, hey, err, I don't know what to say.
I'd say nothing. Nothing's good. Go with nothing.
[V.O.] Sometimes, when you meet a new operative, it's a good idea to open with an aggressive move. You learn about people when you make them play defense: their reflexes, weaknesses, how they handle themselves under pressure. And even if they are able to counter, it never hurts to know how far they're willing to go.
[V.O.] When meeting a covert operative for the first time, the arrangements can tell you a lot: if they give you a map and a photo, they trust you; a place and a time, they want to check you out before they make contact; a cryptic clue like "tidy pelican", they've just got an irritating sense of humor.
VWVictor the Wrangler
I don't like your field tactics.
I don't like your whining. Are you gonna pout all night?
[motions to his bodyguard] Fiona? Do me a favor, keep Jackass company. Shouldn't be hard, he's attracted to shiny objects.
You wanna be a badass, you gotta eat healthy!
[Sam and Virgil, Michael's houseguest, are talking to Michael on the phone.]
VVirgil
Listen, I didn't pack enough underwear, so I borrowed a set of your boxers: the blue ones with the stripes.
[visibly horrified] They will never fit you; stay out of my closet.
VVirgil
They're a little snug down under, but I got all packed in. 'Preciate it.
Mike, be glad you didn't have to see that.
[Michael stops a soccer ball headed in his direction.]
BBoy
Kick it! Kick it!
[Michael kicks the ball towards the boy.]
MMarcela
Hey, no ball on the sidewalk.
He started it.
[Michael and Virgil find a stash of stolen drugs in Feldman's golfing store.]
[laying a series of photographs on the counter] Quite a clientele. Banker... Superior Court Judge... We thought we'd mail each of these people a photograph of himself walking out the door of this shop, in one of these lovely handsome frames...
FFeldman
All right, just stop it! I got a call about the drugs. I sell Viagra, Vicodin and tranqs, what am I gonna do with a million dollars' worth of anti-virals?
VVirgil
Who is this guy anyway?
FFeldman
His name's Gerard, he's a total psycho.
You are gonna call Gerard, you are going to tell him you have a buyer for his drugs.
FFeldman
No, I can't do that, that's insane...
What will the neighbors think? They've been living next to a... [shouts toward the door of the shop] DRUG DEALER!
FFeldman
Shh, shh, shh!
"He seemed so nice..."
[voice-over] For certain types of criminals, partying hard serves an important management function. You can keep an eye on your employees during the off-hours, and keep them spending money, so they're hungry for the next score.
[V.O.] Dealing with a trained operative is like playing chess with a master. Dealing with criminals, on the other hand, is like playing checkers with a three-year-old: they like to change the rules.
[Michael pretends to shoot Virgil, who falls off a boat into the ocean.]
[V.O.] Navy SEALs are trained to hold their breath for 3-5 minutes underwater. If you're an ex-Navy SEAL, then you probably still have the chops, but there's only one way to find out.
If the devil had a name, it'd be "Chuck... [whispering] Finley"!
[V.O.] Spies make great neighbors; they're polite, they keep the lawn trim, and they never crank up the music at night. They don't stand out, because they don't want to be found. So if you're hunting for a covert operative and all you've got to go on are the names of a few dozen suspects, you're out of luck... unless you know where to look.
These quotes come from Wikiquote's Burn Notice pages and are available under the Creative Commons Attribution-ShareAlike License.