Blackadder and Baldrick in “Unfinished Business”

I tell you, Baldrick, I'm not looking forward to this evening. Trying to serenade a light, fluffy bunny of a girl for an arrogant half-German yob with a mad dad.

Baldrick

Well, he is the Prince of Wales.

Have you ever been to Wales, Baldrick?

Baldrick

No. But I've often thought I'd like to.

Well, don't. It's a ghastly place. Huge gangs of tough, sinewy men roam the valleys terrifying people with their close harmony singing. You need half a pint of phlegm in your throat just to pronounce the place names. Never ask for directions in Wales, Baldrick. You'll be washing spit out of your hair for a fortnight.

Baldrick

So, being prince of it isn't considered a plus?

I fear not, no. But the crucial thing is that they must never be left alone together before the wedding.

Baldrick

Isn't that a bit unfair on her?

Well, it's not exactly fair on him either. The girl is wetter than a haddock's bathing costume. But, you know, Baldrick, the world isn't fair. If it was, things like this wouldn't happen, would they? [smacks Baldrick on the back of the head]