Sorry I'm late!
Oh, don't bother apologising. I'm sorry you're alive.
Not bad, Edmund. Ah, I see the target's ready. I'd like to see the Spaniard who could make his way past me.
Well, go to Spain. There are millions of them.
I advise them to stay there then, keep their hands off our women.
Oh god, who is she this time?
I don't know what you mean.
[swipes the pink note sticking out of Percy's tunic, opens it and kicks Percy when he tries to take it back] Ah, and who is Jane?
I am sworn to secrecy. Torture me, kill me, you shall never know. [Blackadder, without looking, kicks him in the groin] Jane Harrington! We are very much in love, my lord.
This is the Jane Harrington?
Yes.
Jane "Bury-Me-In-A-Y-Shaped-Coffin" Harrington?
Um, I think maybe there are two Jane Harringtons.
No, tall, blonde, elegant?
That's right.
Goes like a privy door when the plague's in town?
My lord!
Go on, get on with your shot. You'll get over her. I did. [Percy, breathing heavily to calm himself, readies his shot] So did Baldrick, actually.
[Percy slips, shooting Baldrick in the groin, causing Baldrick to scream in agony for seconds]
Damn!
See, she's got this thing about beards, apparently.
Well, in that case, I'm going to shave!
More from this episode
All quotes from this episode →More Blackadder quotes · These quotes come from Wikiquote's Blackadder pages and are available under the Creative Commons Attribution-ShareAlike License.

