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Bewitched quotes

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Bewitched
All S3 S4 S5 S6 S8

S8 E20Tabitha's First Day at School

[After Charlton keeps insisting that Tabitha turned him into a bullfrog.]

CSCharlton's mom

Why does he keep saying that?

Well, maybe it's a case of ego identification.

CSCharlton's mom

Yeah. [She thinks for a second.] What's that?

Well, a bullfrog suggests bully, doesn't it?

CSCharlton's mom

Yes.

Do you follow me?

CSCharlton's mom

No.

Children need love and understanding. Without it, they sometimes become overly aggressive and turn into bullies.

CSCharlton's mom

Oh. Charlton, did you really think you were a bullfrog?

CBCharlton, the bully

I WAS a bullfrog.

Love and understanding, Mrs Rollnick.

[After Samantha has convinced the bully's mother that he only imagined himself as a bullfrog]

Young lady! You have nothing to laugh about, you started this whole mess. Now, how are we gonna deal with you?

I have an idea.

What's that?

How about a little love and understanding?

Why is it that I feel like the fox thats been cornered by the chicken!?

S8 E21George Washington Zapped Here

[After George Washington sees Abraham Lincoln's face on the $5 bill and his on the $1 bill].

GWGeorge Washington

And who is this bearded fellow?

That's Abraham Lincoln. The 16th president.

GWGeorge Washington

He must have been a very fine president to have his name honored on a $5 bill.

He was an excellent president, Sir.

GWGeorge Washington

Better than me?

Oh, I wouldn't say that.

GWGeorge Washington

Then why is President Lincoln's name on a $5 bill while the father of his country is only on a $1 bill?

Well, you see, more people can afford $1 bills than $5 bills which means more people see your picture than Abraham Lincoln's.

Sometimes, it's easier to be led than to lead. And a great many of our citizens prefer to stand on the sidelines and ignore their rights instead of defend them. They're called "The Silent Majority".

GWGeorge Washington

Experience has shown that mankind is more disposed to suffer evils while those evils are sufferable, than to right themselves and abolish those abuses.

[Referring to Esmerelda]

How come you witches can do anything, but you can't come up with a witch psychiatrist for her!

S8 E23School Days, School Daze

S8 E24A Good Turn Never Goes Unpunished

S8 E25Samantha's Witchcraft Blows a Fuse

S8 E26The Truth, Nothing But the Truth, So Help Me Sam

Darrin, don't make mother angry. She's very difficult when she gets angry.

Since when does she have to be angry to be difficult?

Your right, Derweed. I don't have to be angry to be difficult. [pause] But it helps.

Oh, Darrin. When are you going to learn that mother knows best. And what mother knows best - is how to be difficult.

[The last lines spoken in the series. Darrin is testing the truth spell Endora has cast]

Honey. You're beautiful, sweet, clever, adorable and I love you madly. [referring to the spell] It works.

Well, it doesn't work on me. But I love you. And that is the truth, the whole truth and etcetera.

Cousin Serena Strikes Again

[Referring to Darrin's beautiful, but snobby, client.]

Personally, I think she should see a plastic surgeon.

What for?

To have her nose lowered.

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