Stan Smith: [picks up the phone] This is Stan Smith.
Principal Lewis: Mr. Smith, I'm afraid there's a problem with your son.
Stanley Smith: Oh, God, he's gay. This is it. This is the gay call. I've been ready for this for years. [takes out a vial and starts chugging down pills]
Principal Lewis: Uhh, no. It's just that he's gone mad with power. He evacuated the entire school and barricaded himself in my office.
Stan Smith: I see. [foam starts coming out of his mouth]: Henry, antidote.

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