Janet (Reyes; to the Lost & found woman), Lost & Found woman (Denberg) and others in “Unfinished Business”

'Scuse me?

#1?

Yes. I lost my backpack; has anyone turned one in?

Is it a...black canvas bag with lights all around it?

Yes; that's the one!

Ah, ah...wait just a minute. How do I know that this is yours?

Because I told you so.

I'm instructed to get a detailed description before releasing any item.

Okay; I'll tell you what's inside.

A calculator.

Yep. What else?

A Teddy bear.

Anything...unusual about the Teddy bear?

Yes; as a matter of fact, it only has one eye.

So far, so good. Keep going.

Keep going? Isn't that enough?

Well, there's a lot of stuff in here.

Okay. There's a glow-in-the-dark Statue of Liberty.

Doesn't look like it glows to me.

Well, you have to put it in the light first. There's a big red flashlight in my backpack; use that.

Not much of a glow if you ask me, but...I'll give you the benefit of the doubt.

How generous of you. Now, may I have my stuff, please?

Ah, ah...we have not yet established that this is "your stuff".

What about the hedge clippers? Sausage links?

What about them?

Well, if this wasn't my backpack, how on Earth would I know they were in there?

Lucky guess?

Well, that's five lucky guesses in a row.

Look. People pick six winning numbers in the lottery every day. A lot of people. I'm not impressed! Besides...there's still one more thing in here.

Okay. There's a gold pendant with an inscription from my grandmother.

Which says...?

"To Janet,...I will always have a special place for you in my heart. Love, Grandma Eva".

Aha! Nice try! This says "Love, Grandma Ethel", not "Eva". Close, but no backpack.

You're right. I can't believe it. I guess this isn't my stuff.

That's exactly why we go through this procedure.

I'm sorry I wasted your time.

Oh, quite all right; it happens all the time. (She starts putting the things back into the backpack)