Top Gear quotes
1565 total quotesAll Seasons Season 1 Season 2 Season 3 Season 4 Season 5 Season 6 Season 7 Season 8
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Richard: Wow! A TVR band! So presumably they play really loud, really fast and then burst into flames!
[James May explaining the artwork on his car]: To understand what Jeremy has done to the car, you must understand that this is deep Republican territory. That woman is the Arch-Democrat. She's the Anti-Christ.
[About the BBC requiring all its employees to take a safe driving course]
Jeremy: [Reading from a paper] The BBC is committed to reducing the risks from this activity (driving). They are making it sound like masturbation.
James: Stop driving or you'll go blind.
Jeremy: Exactly!
Jeremy: [Reading from a paper] The BBC is committed to reducing the risks from this activity (driving). They are making it sound like masturbation.
James: Stop driving or you'll go blind.
Jeremy: Exactly!
[after the Reliant shuttle crashed and exploded]
James: That's why...
Richard: How are we going to use it again?
James: That's why...
Richard: How are we going to use it again?
[after wiping of the "offending" artwork]
Jeremy (narrating): With the artwork gone, we hit the road...hard.
Jeremy:I'm doing something I'd never thought I would do. I am running for the border.
James: God in heaven, that was actually frightening.
Richard: They could've killed us!
Jeremy: They really do have an irony deficiency here. I can honestly believe that in certain parts of America now, people have started to mate with vegetables.
Jeremy (narrating): With the artwork gone, we hit the road...hard.
Jeremy:I'm doing something I'd never thought I would do. I am running for the border.
James: God in heaven, that was actually frightening.
Richard: They could've killed us!
Jeremy: They really do have an irony deficiency here. I can honestly believe that in certain parts of America now, people have started to mate with vegetables.
[As the trio decides to flee the gas station]
James: Hammond?
Richard: What?
James: Jump leads!
Richard: You're joking...
James: Hammond?
Richard: What?
James: Jump leads!
Richard: You're joking...
[at a car dealer in Miami]
Jeremy: It's $2900 this. It's a big ask to get him down to a thousand. I might offer him a burger...
[the obese car dealer arrives to show the vehicle]
Jeremy: Very popular with murderers, these cars.
Obese Car Dealer: Yeah.
Jeremy: It's $2900 this. It's a big ask to get him down to a thousand. I might offer him a burger...
[the obese car dealer arrives to show the vehicle]
Jeremy: Very popular with murderers, these cars.
Obese Car Dealer: Yeah.
[Closing remarks]
Jeremy: So, this week we have two Top Gear Top Tips for you. Firstly, yes, you can buy instead of rent, and secondly, don't go to America!
Jeremy: So, this week we have two Top Gear Top Tips for you. Firstly, yes, you can buy instead of rent, and secondly, don't go to America!
[discussing their challenge to eat road-kill]
Richard: 'Well that's okay. [to Jeremy] You can prepare it, wash it and such, I can cook it and James can dress for dinner!
Richard: 'Well that's okay. [to Jeremy] You can prepare it, wash it and such, I can cook it and James can dress for dinner!
[During the opening sequence.]
Jeremy: Tonight: Hugh Grant stars in our Reasonably-Priced Car; and is the new Audi TT any good? We find out... by playing golf.
Jeremy: Tonight: Hugh Grant stars in our Reasonably-Priced Car; and is the new Audi TT any good? We find out... by playing golf.
[During the opening sequence.]
Jeremy: Tonight: Jaguar's supercharged XKR vs. its twin sister; why do road-works take so long? And Jamie Oliver prepares a delicious lap in our Reasonably-Priced Car!
Jeremy: Tonight: Jaguar's supercharged XKR vs. its twin sister; why do road-works take so long? And Jamie Oliver prepares a delicious lap in our Reasonably-Priced Car!
[During the opening sequence.]
Jeremy: Tonight: One small stumble for man as we build a space shuttle; I drive a nuclear bomb disguised as a Mercedes; and Simon Pegg makes a hot fuzz in our Reasonably-Priced Car.
Simon: [timidly] Help!
Jeremy: Tonight: One small stumble for man as we build a space shuttle; I drive a nuclear bomb disguised as a Mercedes; and Simon Pegg makes a hot fuzz in our Reasonably-Priced Car.
Simon: [timidly] Help!
[During the opening sequence.]
Jeremy: Tonight: We cut some cars in half with saws; Richard smokes a horse; and who's in our Reasonably Priced Car? Oh, it's his assistant!
Jeremy: Tonight: We cut some cars in half with saws; Richard smokes a horse; and who's in our Reasonably Priced Car? Oh, it's his assistant!
[During the opening sequence.]
Jeremy: Tonight: We try to grow our own petrol; I drive the new Lamborghini, quite badly; And cool-wall muse Kristin Scott Thomas is in our Reasonably-Priced Car!
Jeremy: Tonight: We try to grow our own petrol; I drive the new Lamborghini, quite badly; And cool-wall muse Kristin Scott Thomas is in our Reasonably-Priced Car!