Xavier: Renegade Angel Season 1 quotes

(To himself in a mirror) Okay, you look normal. Now just act normal. Clutch the dark purple hairs of the galloping orangutan of normalicy and ride, nigga, ride!

Huh, impressive. You have a fresh approach to being normal. You think outside the box.

(After being put on the spot for a new business idea by Peterson) I know I was moving my hot dog in and out of Peterson's wife's buns last night.

My wife is dead.

I never said it was consensual. Don't worry, I used condiments. She enjoyed it with relish! Her mouth passed mustard! I could hardly ketchup to her va-gi-na!

I gotta warn you, If you beat me up, one day that pain will come back to me [Xavier folds himself in a sexual position] sexfold.

Not you, freak, this here terroristic sand negroid! [He slams and punches the Muslim against the ground] Take crime! Taste the hate!

[picking up the Muslim] They queefer to be called Sandfrican-Americans!

If you want to experience the real America, you've got to build an artificial world, a robotic amusement park, full of android Americans programmed to be good to you and to let you into their humble lives.

[trying to perform CPR on a dead man at a funeral] People! A man has fallen! Man down! He needs help! You dark heartless rubberneckers sit back in black! Asses to asses! Butts in dust, doing nutting all over the face of this place!

I hate to brag my britches, but I'm a rather large medium when I penetrate the gray veil. Baleed me, once I get this dead motor mouth yapping through me, he won't stop chewing my lips off till I have to knock his black off and jack our mouths off.

Mine is the story of a man searching far and wide, fat and thick and deep for his mother once thought dead. Have you seen her? She's about yay tall and about ooh, big [cupping where breasts would be on his chest] and about mmm, nice. [groping his crotch] I have a sketch you could print. [pulls out sketch of himself]

[Writing] Wow... look at him... go.

Does your paper have a missed connection section? Take this down! You: Sandy, 5ft blonde, pretty drunk, we made passing eye contact whilst you were giving birth to me. Me: single white male, thick and huge, I tore you up that night, cocoa?

[lapping his own blood] If I could do it all over again, I would do exactly the same thing.

Eat that ketchup nice and good.

I suspect I'm crazy with a capital and sideways Z that's also flipped upside down, interestingly.

That would make you... "craNy"?

[after having sex with his mother] I am no longer a mama's boy. She made me a mama's man.

I'm not violent at all, look! [blasts a laser and kills a group of people playing volleyball]

But you killed those people!

Did I? [aside glance] What he doesn't know is that I'm using reverse psychology on him.

I can tell you're trying to use reverse psychology on me.

That proves he doesn't know!