I'll be your violence absorber, your cosmic sponge of aggression, sucking off all the machismo you can sploot my way. I'll let these kit shickers kit the shick out of me and then let them shove the kack of their human shick in my face. I'll let them kick the bejesus out of me and then rub the bejeez into my hair. I'll take your licks and bounce for you.
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