Television Commercial quotes from Xavier: Renegade Angel

Uh-oh, now there was a factory mix-up! We accidentally mixed up the cookie factory with the tampon factory!

Whoopsie-doodle, there was a mix-up at the cookie factory! We made the cookies way too big and the chocolate chips b-b-b-blue?!

My God! No one deserves a mix-up that bad! I've got to help those poor bastards.

Clumso the cookie chef really popped a boner into these yummy snacks! Blue chocolate Whoopsie Doodles, available for a limited time only!

Recent science has discovered that, for thousands of years, Tibetan monks used gutteral prayer chants to sooth their yellow souls in the yellow face of their yellow oppressors. But in our sophisticated world, who has time for that noise? You've got enough on your plate. Let Fiddelin do the spiritual legwork for you. At transcendental medication, we sonically condense the biodharmic vibrations of over 1,000 monk chants into every pill. Scienspiritific audiologists have found that vibration from a monk's throat doesn't radiate in megahertz but in megahearts.

Come to Jamaica!

If not now, when? If not it, what? If not things, stuff? Side effects include wetmouth, plaid blood, frozen day rate, herniated monsterism, taint misbehaving, urethral screamage, global colostomy face, wrongbody, restless lung syndrome and sexual diarrhea. Do not wake the sleeping yellow dragon. Who says you can't find purity in a pill? Tune in to Fiddelin with your soul.