John (after being injured from a sea urchin): I need someone who can pee on my hand!
All S1
S1 E15Unfinished Business
TTed
I'm not even attracted to you!
Jeff: For the first time ever, I have no idea who a ballot is for. Who wrote 'Bye Bye Denver Diva'?
Clay: It's supposed to be for Ghandia.
Jeff: In the future, guys, just write a name down on your ballot. Enough with the nicknames.
RRob
(voting for Roger) Here comes tonight's long distance dedication. It goes out to Rob from New York. He writes, 'Dear Casey, there is a mean old man in my life that's about to leave. Can you please play something appropriate for me?' Well, Rob, here's your request—Na na na na, na na na na, hey hey hey, goodbye.
Jon, what are you basing your vote on tonight?
JJon
Astrological signs!
Are you loaded?
What is this about?
JFJohnny Fairplay
This this... that's ... that's Johnny Fairplay right there. That's the "F", that's the "Y". I'm all in between. Johnny Fairplay. I play fair. No cheating.
JJon
(voting confessional against Shawn) F*** you.
Well, Osten - I don't pretend to know what you're thinking either, but I know this: I've been to about a hundred Tribal Councils. Never, ever seen anybody lay down their torch. So, this is a first for me. Seems unanimous. I just want to make sure. Savage - you're going to indulge Osten, sending him home?
AAndrew
Yes.
Darrah?
DDarrah
Yeah.
Rhino?
RORyan O.
Yep.
T?
TTijuana
Yes.
No need to vote and waste any more time. Grab your torch.
Osten, per your wishes (he snuffs out the torch)...go home."
With all due respect to Osten, people work too damn hard to stay in this game and fight to stay alive. He wants to lay his torch down? So it shall be. Who knows? Maybe this is the best thing to happen to the Morgan tribe. All I know is, you will head back to camp. Soon, a new tribe member will arrive, and I can promise you this: That person wants to be in this game. Grab your torches, head on back. Good night.
JJon (Jonny Fairplay)
How's Grandma?
DJDan ("Thunder" Dan Fields), Jon's friend
She died, dude. (Jon's grandmother was actually alive and well; this exchange was a deliberately staged ploy to get sympathy from the other contestants.)
JJon
My grandmother's sitting home watching Jerry Springer right now. (laughs)
We got an overweight, gay, naked man walking around, and no one seems to let it bother them.
Is it possible to call a gay man a stud?
These quotes come from Wikiquote's Survivor pages and are available under the Creative Commons Attribution-ShareAlike License.