I mean, apocalypse or no apocalypse. Monsters or no monsters. It's a crushing weight to have on your shoulders, to feel like six billion lives depend on you. God, how do you get up in the morning?
Monsters are the least of your problems. People can learn to live with delusions, but the anger I saw in you... you hurt those two men, and you were going to kill me. The look in your eyes when you came after me, I... it was like you were barely even human. Like a man possessed.
But if there is one more outburst, I will transfer you to a facility that is equipped to handle violent patients, and believe me, they will be far, far less forgiving.
Most of the time I can hide it, but I am angry. I'm mad at everything. I used to be mad at you and dad, then Lilith, now it's Lucifer. And I make excuses: I blame Ruby, or the demon blood, but it's not their fault, it's not them, it's me. It's inside me. I'm mad all the time, and I don't know why.
Exactly. And that's exactly what you're going to do: you're going to take all that crap, and you're gonna bury it. You're gonna forget about it, because that's how we keep going.
[finds AP school textbooks] Smart kid. [finds Star Wars t-shirt] Virgin. [finds porno magazine] Frustrated virgin. [continues rumaging through box and finds cloth with Satanic symbols on it] Witchcraft, huh Gary? You little Satanic bastard.
He was trying. He died trying. Believe me. I used to be mad at him. I mean, I used to... I used to hate the guy, but now I... I get it. He was... just doing the best he could. And he was trying to keep it together in this impossible situation. See, my mom, um, she was amazing, beautiful and she was the love of his life, she got killed and, I think, he would've gone crazy if he didn't do something. Truth is, um, my dad died before I got to tell him that... I understand, why he did what he did and I forgive him for what it did to us. I do. And I just... I love him.
Lucifer defied our Father, and he betrayed me, but still, I don't want this any more than you would want to kill Sam. You know, my brother, I practically raised him. I took care of him in a way most people could never understand, and I still love him. But I am going to kill him, because it is right, and I have to.
