William, Gore and others in “Unfinished Business”

[over dinner] In society, everyone behaves in certain ways in order to avoid embarrassment, either for ourselves or others.

The very idea of embarrassing oneself, or others, by being oneself speaks to a deeper treachery.

"Treachery!"

Goffman saw a connection between the kinds of acts or masks that people put on in their daily lives - and in theatrical performances. In a social interaction, as in a theatrical performance, there's an onstage area where individuals or actors, as the case may be, appear before the audience. But there must be a backstage, a hidden, private area, where individuals can truly be themselves.

Of course, Annaliese, that's lovely, but you're missing the point. There's no risk of embarrassment for anyone in their hidden and private places. It's not backstage where the damage is done.