Well, I believe I found the problem.
You're shitting me.
That's repulsive, and I most certainly am not.
All S1
S1 E15Unfinished Business
Next time we steal uniforms off of dead guys, could you please make sure I go for the larger one?
Why?
Those trousers are so tight, I nearly castrated myself.
Rao forbid.
Oh, I'd - I'd offer you a drink, but what'd be the point? You're not a real boy.
I appreciate the tactful reminder. You seem what distressed. Is there anything I can assist you with?
Oh, can you shoot lasers from your eyes and bench press the Sun?
I'm afraid that's beyond my capabilities.
You killed my grandfather when he tried to warn you about Brainiac. And now you are working for him.
I had no choice.
There's always a choice. You just made the wrong one. Now's he gonna take the city.
I don't know what you're talking about.
Your new master is going to rip Kandor from the ground and enslave all of us. I need to know how he's going to do it so I can stop him.
I have idea. And if it were true, you're deluding yourself if you think you have the power to stop him. Better to live under his rule than to die.
Coward. You won't live to see it.
Look at me.
None are worthy to look upon the Voice of Rao's face.
There is no Voice of Rao. Only the agent of Brainiac.
Are you here to destroy us?
Don't be foolish. I'm here to save you.
From what?
Entropy. I will lead this city into a glorious new future. Your way of life preserved for all eternity.
Then you and I have the same goals. The same vision. Let me serve you.
An interesting offer. Let's put your new found loyalty to the test. If I detect deception, you die. Who was behind this coup attempt?
I was, it - Along with Primus Zod. We also had the support of five members of the Supreme Council.
Why did you wish your leader dead?
He was an ignorant zealot and peddled false hope in a nonexistent god.
You don't believe in this sun god of yours. Why?
My parents... worshipped the goddess of ice - Cythonna. After the Catalysm, all religions except Raoism were banned but unofficially tolerated. When the Voice of Rao was anointed, he initiated the Great Purge, and those who did not convert were killed and disappeared. My parents refused. And I never saw them again. All I know is... their god couldn't save them any more than Rao's prophet from you.
No, the device's photonic discharge cells were damaged.
Well, can you fix it?
I already have.
So... I can leave?
If that's your choice. But tell me something first. If you're not a real hero, as you claim to be, why'd you come here in the first place?
Because I thought I could become one. I thought that if I could just save Superman, then the Justice League would have to notice me and maybe even people would look up to me. And maybe, just maybe, when I look in that mirror, I wouldn't see a loser staring back at me. That's all gone now.
Whatever happened between you and Seg can be fixed. He may be stubborn, but he knows a true friend when he finds one.
Ah, there's no fixing this.
Adam, Adam. No matter what you think about yourself, being a hero is not about... It's not about strength or having extraordinary capabilities. It's about making the decision to help others. Now, regardless of the reason, you chose to come here. You can still set things right. Hmm?
You're right. I can. There's something here I still need to do.
And what's that?
Kill General Zod and prevent Seg from saving Kandor.
I was an idiot to think I could save him.
Who?
Big Blue, the Boy Scout, the Man of Steel. God, he's got a lot of nicknames. You know why? He's a hero. Heroes get nicknames.
What was your nickname?
I don't have one.
You said you're a great hero of your planet.
I lied. Apparently, that's my superpower - lying. No, I'm a wannabe. D-lister. Can't fly, have no super strength, no power ring. No, the only thing I had going for me was that Zeta-Beam device, and now that's broken. God, I suck.
GZGeneral Zod
So, what are we going to do?
We need to raise an army. We can go to Kryptonopolis, establish a base there, reach out to other city-states, and return in force.
My sisters live there. They can provide us with those resources and connections we need.
GZGeneral Zod
There's no time. Brainiac's gonna take the city in a matter of weeks. We must stay and fight!
We will not stand a chance. He controls the Sagitari. If we attempt this ourselves, we'll be slaughtered.
GZGeneral Zod
Then so be it. If we are going to die, then at least...
I'm just gonna stop you there. Um, I don't wanna die, so...
There's another way. The Nova Cycle celebration. That's how we get our army. [holds up a blaster]
Not with that. Our weapons have no effect on him.
They might not harm him, but they will piss him off... when everyone was gonna be watching. If we can provoke him into revealing his true nature, if we can show the people that the Voice of Rao is an alien creature, the entire city will rise and stand against him. We will have our army.
GZGeneral Zod
Kal-El, the Superman you keep hearing about. He was no different than any other kryptonian. He just happened to make it off our planet before it was destroyed. Then landed on a planet with a yellow sun. That's what makes him super. Radiation. That and dumb luck. But if Krypton never was destroyed, we could all have the powers he has. Imagine all the good that could do in the universe.
How did you survive Krypton's destruction?
GZGeneral Zod
I wasn't on Krypton when it exploded.
Where were you?
GZGeneral Zod
The Phantom Zone. It's... sort of an extra dimension or... abyss. Defying the laws of space or time. Turns out it's perfect for housing criminals.
You were in prison? What did you do?
GZGeneral Zod
I attempted a coup. Guess it runs in the family. I grew up in Kryptonopolis, and the council there was inept as yours here in Kandor. There was one person on the council that I truly respected. Of course, he was the one who foiled my plans and sent me away. His name was Jor-El.
Hurry, Val, we're all counting on you.
Thank you, I am very well aware of that.
Good, because whatever it takes, you need to find a way! Understood?
I'm an El. We always find a way.
As long as there is an El on Krypton, there will be hope. And hope can be a powerful thing.
We will seek out civilizations beyond our system, and we will conquer them! If they submit peacefully, they will fall under my protection, and shall never know fear again. But if they do not, then like the recalcitrant leaders of Krypton's other city-states we see before us, eventually they will all KNEEL BEFORE ZOD!
GZGeneral Zod
We will need your grandfather's unsurpassed intellect. I believe Val-El is our last, best hope.
You left my grandfather stranded in that place with no way out, but now that we need him, you suddenly have a way to free him.
GZGeneral Zod
If you hadn't kept this place a secret from me, I couldn't have done it anytime, if there had been a need. [to Val] I assume you can activate it.
So what's the catch?
GZGeneral Zod
Someone has to go in and get him.
I'll go.
GZGeneral Zod
You would get lost in there forever. I know my way around and I'll find him.
Or now that you've failed to stop Brainiac, this is your means of escape.
GZGeneral Zod
No one's ever been in there would consider going back an escape.
Grandfather, it's me. It's Seg.
You think I wouldn't recognize my own grandson.
These quotes come from Wikiquote's Krypton pages and are available under the Creative Commons Attribution-ShareAlike License.