Fighting with the vending machine?
No, it just gave me an electric shock.
[The Doctor checks his palm. There's something moving under the skin]
That's not a shock. It's a hopper virus. This machine's sick and it just passed its virus onto you.
How did I get a virus the same as a vending machine? I'm not a machine.
Hoppers are multi-platform. They'll go for anything. Don't pick at it!
[The hopper heads up Ryan's arm]
Oh, did it just go through me?
It's moving deeper inside you to mutate into your nervous system.
What?
Important not to panic. Humans always have the same reaction to a hopper virus. First you get the wiggly fingers, which is a warning the legs are about to go. [Catches Ryan as he falls] Luckily, this is where my hopper first-aid training kicks in. Need to get rid of these. [Opens the packet of snacks and empties its contents on the floor] Then pinch your ear! [Does so]
Ow!
Then you're going to sneeze!
[Sneezes]
[The Doctor catches the hopper in the packet]
Yes. Now suck your thumb until the hallucinations stop. And remember, they're not real bats. [Helps Ryan to his feet]
[Ryan begins flailing at the invisible bats]
He's fine. He's fine.
Make the bats go away!
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