Faye Valentine quotes from Cowboy Bebop

Faye

It's so ugly... and pieces of it are still broken!

Jet

[mutters] Too bad it wasn't your mouth that was broken.

Faye

I heard that.

Spike

That's all you're gonna get, Faye.

Faye

I know... don't sweat it.

Spike

Depositing it at the casino again?

Faye

It's a lot more fun than the bank.

Spike

Girl never gives up...

Faye

Hackers are nerdy, pasty, tubby little geeks with triple-thick glasses, and this one is probably a demented otaku with smelly feet, so catching him will be a breeze.

Jet

Is that right? And what do you know about hackers, anyway? It might've been like that when you were young, but that was a long time ago.

Faye

What are you trying to say, Jet? That I'm starting to get old like you?

Jet

Well, you can't tell a woman's age by looking—oww! [Faye rams her heel into his foot]

Faye

And you can't tell what a woman will DO by looking, so you'll have to be very careful.

Jet

Same with a snake!

Spike

[chuckles] You two make a lovely couple.

Faye

I'm waiting!

Ed will introduce Ed's full name - Edward Wong Hau Pepelu Tivrusky IV.

Spike

That's a long name.

Faye

Who the hell's this?

Ed made up that name for Ed, isn't it cool?

Spike

If you made it up, how can you be the 4th?

Faye

He's kidding himself if he thinks his old girlfriend's still carrying the torch for him.

Spike

And you're kidding yourself if you think every woman's like you. They're not you know.

Faye

So what is it? [hears Ein barking] Ein, give it a rest, would ya?

Spike

Well, this is not an ordinary rat. [Ein keeps barking] Huh? Ein, keep it quiet!

Faye

So what could it be, then?!

Spike

Well, it's a—

A mystery space creature! [Spike and Faye gasp; she runs upstairs] Spooky! The attack of the horrible alien!

Spike

Well, yeah... That is possible, I suppose. [scoffs] Oh yeah, right. [Ed suddenly jumps down next to Spike]

Then what is it? It's not in the database, right?

Spike

Well, uh— [Ed points]

Look! These pairs are abnormal.

Spike

Uhh, you think so?

Ed has never seen this before. [Spike grumbles] So what else could it be but a horrible alien, huh? What?

Spike

Maybe it's... something like a rat went through a mutation and it evolved... and turned into some kind of unusual creature, and secreted this new form of mysterious poison.

Faye

Oh, that's brilliant. Right out there with Ed's theory that it's a horrible alien! Really pitiful.

Gren

Take care. [Faye looks up] That was close. When someone sneezes and doesn't get told to take care, that person turns into a fairy... That's what they say around here.

Faye

Then it's okay. I'm already a fairy.

Faye

Why are you going to see Vicious? Didn't you say he framed you?

Gren

[beat] I want to find out if he did.

Faye

He'll murder you.

Gren

Death does not frighten me.

Faye

You're lying. [Gren pauses for a beat]

Gren

Either way, I don't have long to live.

Faye

So, listen, guys. Why don't we all pony up the information we have on this case, and agree to spilt the bounty three ways. Whaddaya say?

Spike

You're kidding, right? You're the one who said to work separately. "Each one gathering the facts and examining them"?

Jet

Occasional rivalry between comrades is healthy. I believe that's the way you put it.

Spike

Chessmaster Hex, I take it.

Faye

Don't try anything. Understand?

You both... [turns to see Spike and Faye] Well, could you just be a little quieter, please?

Old man... [starts growling with anger] Hand it over! [aims his heavy gun at Hex's face]

Spike

Hey, hold on a minute!

Pretending to be senile won't get you out of this.

Faye

Who are you?!

Either you give me the money you took, or I put a hole right through your brain!

[chuckles as he touches his gun] That's quite a large pipe there.

If we stay here, we'll both get caught. You'd better jump out and run.

Faye

What about you?

I'll meet you at the medical clinic. All right?

Faye

But why are you helping me like this?

Our prince has to protect Sleeping Beauty. That's the way it works.

Faye

[grumpy] How long were you in there listening, Spike?

Spike

Too long. Your story needs editing.

Faye

Stay back! We're leaving! [Jet and Spike stop at their tracks]

Jet

She wants the guy instead of the money.

Spike

Jet caught him! It's his reward, Faye!

Faye

I have some history to work out with this guy, so I claim first rites to him and to the bounty that's on his head!

Spike

[dumbfounded] Is it just me, or did that not make any sense?

Jet

Just like I said, women don't work on reason.

Faye

[arguing over empty rations] We haven't had anything to eat in two days! Wouldn't you call that an emergency?!

Spike

I want some bell peppers and beef...

Jet

We're out of fuel, end of story. If we can just hold out a little longer, our inertia will carry us to Europa.

Stomach's caving in!

Faye

If we only we could use that energy to fuel ourselves...

Jet

Keep mouthing off like that and I'll toss you out into absolute zero.

Spike

At this point, even Ein looks good enough to eat.

Faye

Watch it, Spike. I bet you're looking pretty good to him too.

Jet

Pay up. 6300 woolongs.

Faye

What? Where did that come from, huh?

Jet

Special delivery for you.

Faye

Well, I didn't order anything.

Jet

It was COD. [Faye grunts] Top it off, there's no return address on it. I had no choice but to accept it and pay your ta— [Faye slowly reaches the handle and shuts the cockpit door] Hmm? Hey, hold on! [Faye flies her ship away from the Bebop deck] Hey, I want my money or else!

Spike

[turns away from fishing] She's a busy girl, huh?