Gareth and Mrs Courtney in “A Bird in the Hand”

This is personal. I want to be rude, I'm hoping to cause offence! I have a life long abhorrence to violence inflicted on women, but I am giving urgent consideration to an exception in your case.

[shocked] Mr Blackstock!

I have just seen your bill! It is for the sort of money which rarely changes hands without the aid of a gun, and a getaway car! There are names at Lloyds, sitting alone in darkened rooms with loaded revolvers who owe less than this! It's a disgrace! You're charging me so much money you can afford to eat in my restaurant! I don't know why you don't just take up drug trafficking and have done.

Now look...

It would mean a sharp drop in your income, granted.

Chef, you've never complained before?

This isn't a bill. This is grievous bodily invoicing! I trusted you, Mrs Courtney. "Bring me the best," I said, "and I will pay you what is fair!"

Well, yes.

And you betrayed my trust. And you have done that which I dread most in all the world.

What's that?

You have proved my wife right!