[The Cousins pull up to a semi truck parked in a deserted parking lot to meet with an arms dealer]
So, you the gentlemen?
[The Cousins say nothing. The arms dealer opens the back doors to the trailer]
Lucky you boys caught me. I've got a load to pick up, I'm taking the 40 straight through to Memphis! I can hammer it out in about 15, but there's this girl down here named Laney or Lolly or somethin'. Maybe Fran. Anyhow, she's got one of these fetish things, she likes to get peed on, y'know, so I was hoping to see her tonight, but she's real strict 'bout wanting to get to sleep before 10, so I wanna wrap it up here ASAP because traffic can be a wild card, y'know, rubberneckin' and such.
[He starts taking off the tarps covering the crates containing his weapons]
Surprising thing is the women who like to get peed on always tend to be from the warmer climates. You'd think the ones in the colder zones would be more inclined but I haven't met one yet. I mean, it's a shock to the system if the body is not properly acclimated, but y'know... leave that for smarter minds than me. Science is a mystery.
[He looks up at the Cousins]
Well, take a gander. Prices are negotiable. Buying in bulk gets you a discount. I'm running a special on these honeys.
[The dealer walks over to a crate that contains boxes of bullets, and picks one up]
JHPs. Hollow-point bullets, known by the natives as "Black Death". Check it out. [tosses it to Marco] You like that? It's so sweet, you'll wanna lick it! Nickel-plated brass casing, Lubalox coat for panache. Sucker has six razor claws that expand upon impact! PEW! Shred your mama's head like a cabbage. [Marco considers then starts to hand it back to the dealer] Keep it. On the house. [Marco puts the Black Death bullet in his pocket] Anyhow, I've been windjamming long enough. Why don't you boys tell me what you're looking for. What it is you want, what is it you need? What can I do you for?
Vests.
Vests? Hell yeah, we've got vests! Right here. [grabs two bulletproof vests from a satchel] Sleek, comfortable, thermally bonded, non-interwoven Kevlar fiber. Stop a bullet like a soft wanger against a Quaker girl! It just ain't getting through. And lightweight? Damn, so lightweight, you'll forget you're wearing it! [tosses the vests, which hit the floor in front of the Cousins]
They work?
Sure as shit, they do! [unbuttons the top button on his shirt to reveal that he's wearing an identical bulletproof vest] I don't leave home without it!
[Leonel promptly pulls out his pistol and shoots the arms dealer in the exposed section of the vest. The arms dealer is knocked to the ground by the impact of the bullet]
Ugh! Ow! What the hell?! You... broke my freaking rib, you maniac son of a bitch!
[As the arms dealer groans in pain, Marco steps forward and looks at the spot where Leonel's bullet hit the vest. He pulls out the bullet and shows it to Leonel, who nods in approval. Marco reaches into his pocket and counts out a stack of $100 bills, which he drops in the dealer's lap. Leonel and Marco then pick up the vests and slowly walk out of the truck]
You're welcome!
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