What are you doing, Albert?
Nothing.
Oh, yes you are, you naughty German sausage. Tell me what you're doing.
I just said I'm not doing anything! Really, woman, when you're busy ruling India, you don't tell me what you are doing. So why should I tell you what I am doing when I am busy wrapping up this cushion for your surprise Christmas present?
[delighted] Oh!
[annoyed at himself] Dem! Now I only have two surprise presents for you.
Oh, dear Albie, don't worry. I don't mind.
[sad] I do! I love surprises. Christmas without surprises is like nuts without a nutcracker. Which is why I have brought you this surprise nutcracker... [realizing he's screwed himself up] Dem! Dem!
Oh, darling Bobo, don't worry. Besides, haven't you forgotten something?
What?
Our traditional Christmas adventure.
[jubilant] Oh yes, the traditional Christmas adventure! Huzzah!
[jubilant] Huzzah!
[confused] What traditional Christmas adventure?
Silly soldier. You know, when we disguise ourselves as common folk and go out amongst the people to reward the virtuous and the good.
Oh yes, of course! Dummkopf! How could I forget? For it is precisely such an outing that I have brought you my final surprise present. This muff, which I'm going to give you tomorrow... [does it again] Dem! Dem! Dem!
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