Dexter quotes

468 total quotes



All Seasons
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Barry: It's tough looking after somebody else's kid. Sometimes you just gotta show 'em who's boss.
Dexter: Is that what you do with Olivia, show her who's boss?
Barry: What's that supposed to mean?
Dexter: I know about Olivia's bruises. How they're strategically placed so they won't show.
Barry: I don't know what you're talking about.
Dexter: No? Let me show you? [Dexter punches Barry twice in the chest, causing him to gasp and cough in pain] That's your solar plexus. Right now your diaphragm is partially paralyzed which is why you're having trouble catching your breath.
Barry: [coughing] What are you, man? Some kind of psycho?
Dexter: Not today, just a concerned parent. [Punches Barry twice in the side, causing him to gasp further] That's your liver. [Punches him in the liver three more times] The nice thing about the liver is if you hit it just right, you hit the vagus nerve which tentacles out to the rest of your body. [Punches him there twice more] Your brain short-circuits, your body shuts down, and you feel, what's the word? Terror? Which is what Olivia felt every time you hit her there just so the bruises wouldn't show. I want you to listen to me carefully. Listen to me very carefully, because this is what you're gonna do. You're gonna call Olivia's mother, you're gonna tell her you're sick of her fat ass. You can't stand to look at it anymore. And you're gonna make her believe it. Because if you don't, she may take you back one day, and let you near her kid, or mine. And I can't let that happen. [Throws Barry to the ground] You're not even gonna swing by to pick up your stuff, you're just gonna leave. Tomorrow, when I drop Olivia off, you will be gone. If you ever come back, believe me I won't go so easy next time. [Kicks Barry in the side] By the way, that's your kidney. [Walks off. Gets into his car]
Harry: I can't believe it.
Dexter: I don't want to hear it, okay. "This isn't your business, Dexter. Don't get involved, Dexter. You put too much at risk, Dexter."
Harry: That's not what I was going to say. [Dexter looks at him, surprised] I'm proud of you.
Dexter: You are?
Harry: You protected Astor. Put yourself out there for another person. I had no idea you had that in you. I underestimated you, assumed you were a monster. When you were capable of, so much more. If only I'd seen that, maybe I wouldn't have lead you down this path.
[Lumen is at Dexter's house when the house phone rings]

Debra: So, how'd your social appointment go last night?
Lundy: Oh. You know.
Debra: I took your advice.
Lundy: My advice?
Debra: Go out. Have some fun. Got laid. Big time.
Lundy: Oh. Well.
Debra: Oh. I mean, I don't usually go out to the gym and pick up strangers.
Lundy: The gym? [laughs]
Debra: Really, you have to save me here, or I'm gonna go outside and shoot myself.
Lundy: And the way you're going, you'd probably miss.
Debra: ... Thanks.
Lundy: My date was horrible. I picked her up, and I don't know Miami, of course, and I got completely lost, and she was chattering away the whole time about this Yogi master I just have to meet so by the time we even got to the restaurant I was tearing my hair out.
Debra: Oh, God. I'm sorry.
Lundy: No, it was good. It was a reminder that, uh, I shouldn't be dating.
Debra: 'Course you should be.
Lundy: No. It all comes down to simple mathematics. A really beautiful relationship is a once in a lifetime thing. And I've already had mine.

Lila: So tell me. Exactly how full of shit are you?
Dexter: I'm not full of anything.
Lila: It was a nice performance in there. Where did you download it from? Addict.com?
Dexter: I have no reason to lie.
Lila: Sure you do. We all do.
Dexter: You thought I was lying?
Lila: I dunno, Bob.
Dexter: Well, it is anonymous.
Lila: Everyone in that room has heard, or lived, far worse than anything you've ever done.
Dexter: I doubt it.
Lila: Oh! So you're Super Junkie.
Dexter: I don't mean to imply that what you've been through hasn't been difficult.
Lila: But there's no way that I could know what you've experienced, right? I couldn't possibly feel that need. Like a thousand hiding voices whispering "this is who you are". And you fight the pressure. The growing need rising like a wave. Prickling and teasing and prodding to be fed. But the whispering gets louder, until they're screaming "now!" And it's the only voice you hear. The only voice you want to hear. And you belong to it. To this ... shadow self. To this ...
Dexter: Dark Passenger.
Lila: Yes. The Dark Passenger.

Debra: It's been 24 hours since I asked to be replaced.
Lundy: ... Has it?
Debra: What's taking so long? Every cop on the damn force wants in on this case. Just take your pick.
Lundy: I've been wondering about that, actually. Everyone wants on but, you want off.
Debra: I told you. I have cases.
Lundy: I don't think so.
Debra: Fuck's sake. Jesus, I don't wanna be on your task force, all right?
Lundy: Why?
Debra: Because I'm the last person in the world that should be on it. You want me to find a serial killer? I was engaged to one, for Christ's sake. What kind of cop � what kind of �
Lundy: That's why I chose you, you know. Because of what you went through. You survived. I don't know how. I can't begin to imagine the strength it took. Continues to take. More than that, you got a first hand look into the mind and heart of a killer. And you're still here. If you can accept that � really accept it � you could use it. Mix that with some of your strength and you can catch someone even worse than the Ice Truck Killer. But you have to stop running. Finish today's interviews. And if you still want out, you got it.

Dexter: [voiceover] We all want life to have some kind of meaning. Seems the older we get, the harder we look for it. And the harder it is to find. And some of us just look in the wrong place. But if our lives don't have meaning, what can we leave behind for those we care about?

Miguel: [wrapped to a table] It doesn't have to come to this.
Dexter: But it always does. I had high hopes for you, but I guess I just have to accept that I will always be alone.
Miguel: That's not true.
Dexter: You talking truth. That's good. You actually had me believing that I could have a friend and you fed me all your bullshit.
Miguel: It wasn't bullshit!
Dexter:[Clamps a hand over Miguel's mouth] Shh...
Miguel: I tried. I tried to crack through that armor of yours. I know it's a possibility. I can still see the possibilities.
Dexter: So this is my fault for being shut down?
Miguel: I just wanted you to let me in!
Dexter: Why the fuck would I do that now?
Miguel: I know you. I know you, Dex, better than anyone else.
Dexter: Oh, there've been quite a few who've seen the real me as they laid on that table. You're all just unchecked versions of myself. What I would've become without my father's code.
Miguel: I'm not like them! I'm like you.
Dexter:[Slaps him] No, no, no, no. No. I know I'm a monster.
Miguel: I accept you. I accept you, Dex, like a brother.
Dexter: I killed my brother.
Miguel: ...
Dexter: I killed yours, too.
Miguel:[Shocked] Oscar?...You?
Dexter: I didn't plan to, but it was... kill or be killed, ya know.
Miguel:[Wracked with emotion] YOU!!! You killed Oscar!
Dexter: What did you say in your bachelor party speech? Friends are always honest.
Miguel: Friends forgive. Friends forgive.
Dexter: But I don't forgive you � and I don't get to have friends.
Miguel:[As Dexter wraps a garrote around his neck] You little freak! You think I'm done with you?! You think this ends here?! IT DOESN'T!!!
Dexter: It does for you.[Strangles Miguel until he's dead]
Dexter: [Voiceover] Adios, amigo.

Debra: Shit a brick and fuck me with it, you're never going to believe who this truck is registered to.

Anton: [pauses during sex with Debra] Hey, do you think you could TiVo Jon Stewart for me?
Debra: You're thinking about Jon Stewart?
Anton: Well, he is handsome and funny...

Dexter: Studies show that emotional intelligence plays a greater role in individual success than anything that can be measured on the standard IQ test.
Debra: Are you calling me an emotional idiot?
Dexter: If you're an idiot, then I'm a vegetable.

Angel: No way your nickname was worse than "Fatista." 'Cause Gianna just rolls off the �
Barbara Gianna: "Va"-gianna.
Angel: Okay, you win. Kids can be cruel.

Angel: Don't go down that emotion road, just go down on her. She'll be distracted.

Arthur: [to his victim as he kills her] Shhh, shhh. it's already over. It's already over.

Addict: I don't need them for the pain anymore. I just ... need them.
Dexter: [thoughts] And I need duct tape. Three or four rolls. Running low on heavy duty trash bags. When's the last time I sharpened my knives?

Angel: You're the lone hold out. Every other suspect has a criminal past, and not just any criminal past. They were all linked to murder.
Woman: Oscar never murdered anybody!
Angel: Then why was he killed?
Woman: I don't know! Maybe he found out who the serial killer is!
Angel: Oh, okay. So, your husband is an engineer, and a secret crime fighter?

Angel: [To Masuka] Cause you're like a retarded puppy.
Masuka: [rubs temple with middle finger at Angel]