Dawn: Oh, my God, guys. Don't drop me.
Bianca: Thank God I wore my good underwear tonight.
Dawn: Thank God I wore underwear!

Joey: (to a shirtless Cameron) Man, I really admire you for busting stereotypes. I'm actually trying to do the same thing. I wanna show the world that straight guys can be models, in the same way that you're trying to show the world that... that gay guys don't have to have six-pack abs.

Joey: I don't even know if she ever loved me. Not the real me. I was just this gorgeous status accessory, like Paris Hilton's poodle.
Bianca: Girls like Chastity don't like other girls playing with their poodles... even if they've given their poodles away. And Chastity can be really mean.
Joey: That's why I'm ready to be with someone really sweet, like you. Take you, for example.

Joey: I got to go tell the coach before he gives my jersey away.
Bianca: Um, don't worry. It has your name on it.
Joey: I know, which is why I don't want him to give it away! Duh?

Kat Stratford: [referring to Bianca] If she is your little flower, what am I?
Walter Stratford: You're my big, tough cactus!
Kat Stratford: Green, spiny and phallic. That's great, Dad.

Kat': That treats me like a laaad-eek! Sweet mother (opens window) What the hell are you doing here? It is eleven o'clock at night! (realises her music is still playing and goes to turn it off, also removing her plate while her back is turned to him)
Patrick: Isn't it obvious? I'm a vampire I need permission to enter.
Kat: Permission NOT granted.
(Patrick climbs through the window)

Kat: (about the yearbook pictures she took) It looks like one of those herpes commercials where everybody is so happy despite the fact that they have herpes.
Chastity: (About the fundraiser) Okay, but no bake sale. The last thing this school needs is more fat people.

Kat: (carrying a clipboard for her petition) Will you sign this? It would be nice to have a real person other than Mr. Balzac and Mr. I.P. Freely.

Kat: (finds Patrick sitting on a ledge on the roof of the school) Don't jump.
Patrick: Oh, I don't have to, you're here now.
Kat: Okay jump.
Patrick: I'm only three stories up. All I'd do is break a leg.
Kat: It'd still be worth it.
Patrick: (points to fire burning in the distance) Come check this out. It's really beautiful.
Kat: If you don't think about all the homes being destroyed.
Patrick: (leans closer and points) Look over there. UGH! (pretends to be slipping off the edge. Kat cries out and reaches for him) Aah!
Kat: Oh! (walks away from the ledge, Patrick follows)
Patrick: See, you don't want me to jump.
Kat: You're such a jerk.
Patrick: Now, I can tell you what I wanted to tell you.
Kat: Ooh, I'm on pins and needles. Let me guess...is it the same thing you wanted to tell the girl downstairs?
Patrick: Oh, I like it when you're jealous.
Kat: I'm not jealous, I'm appalled- there's a difference.
Patrick: Look, I was going to tell her that she should stop stalking me.
Kat: Hmm..big words from the guy who shows up unannounced in my bedroom window at eleven O'clock at night. That's way past visiting hours.
Patrick: You talk a lot. (takes her head in his hands ands kisses her, they continue on for several moments)
Kat: (pulls back, happy) Is that what you wanted to tell me?
Patrick: Sure (smiles and leans in to kiss her again)
Kat: (breaking away quicker this time) No, seriously.
Patrick: Oh, seriously? Okay, I realized why I find you interesting.
Kat: Hmm...do tell.
Patrick: (cupping her face with one hand) You're different from other girls. You have a mind of your own.
Kat: That must be a refreshing change for you.
Patrick: It is, you're not all clingy and...needy. We can just make-out and it doesn't have to be this whole big thing. (leans in to kiss her but Kat pulls away)
Kat: Right. (moves away) Right, because I'm a total slut. But I have a mind of my own.
Patrick: No that's not what I meant.
Kat: Well, what did you mean?
Patrick: I meant you're not living some fairy-tale where I'm your prince charming.
Kat: Trust me. No one would mistake you for prince charming. Prince Charles maybe.
Patrick: Aah! And we were having such a nice time.
Kat: Unbelievable! I'm worried about losing my home all of my stuff, every memory and you just want to hook up.
Patrick: Why do you have to make everything so difficult?
Kat: What can I say, I'm not easy. (Leaves the rooftop)
(Kat's handing out small bottles of water and spots Patrick coming down the hall again, the Old lady's suddenly right next to her)

Kat: (handing a bar of some kind to an old lady) Here you go ma'am.
Old Lady': Does this have seeds in it? I have diverticulitis.
Kat: I'm not sure actually. (looks at packet to see ingredients, looks up and spots Patrick walking down the hall)
Old Lady: Oh, who's that you're undressing with your eyes? Your boyfriend?
Kat: Ugh, no. Just this guy I know.
Old Lady: Oh, missy I wasn't born yesterday.
Kat: I can see that.
(walks around speechless old woman to talk to Patrick)

Kat: [talking about her dad] Now he wants you come to dinner.
Patrick: I'll pass.
Kat: I told it was stupid, but he's affraid you're bad influence on me
Patrick: Huh [he touches her chin] I wonder why [smiling]

Kat: Dad, you realize we know where babies come from, right?
Walter: Do you realize where they come out? Trust me. Not pretty.
Kat and Bianca: Dad!

Kat: High school is like Vietnam and these stupid flowers are Agent Orange.

Kat: How can I call myself an environmentalist when I'm single-handedly exterminating polar bears with my Chernobyl-mobile?

Kat: I just have one thing to say to you. I'm not that girl.
Patrick: What girl?
Kat: The girl who's turned on by the spat boy crap. I'm not skipping home to scribble in my journal that maybe you're a vampire.