[the priests are holding a competition to find out who should get the two parachutes on the plane]
Father Ted: Father Cave, do you want to go first?
Father Cave: I haven't written this down, because this comes from the heart. Father Gallagher, I've known you and been your friend for many years. And I think it's important to say, I love you. I love you more than anyone I've ever loved! I don't want the parachute, give it to him! [sits down and bursts into tears, while the other priests look taken aback]
Father Ted: R-right, well done, Father Cave. Father Fay?
[Fay stands up, clears his throat, then yells monkey-style gibberish while waving his arms around. The other priests look awed and clap admiringly]
Father Ted: Well, beat that! Joe?
Father Joe Briefly: I think I should get the parachute because I'm great. In fact, I think I should get both the parachutes, in case one of them doesn't work! [disapproving grumbles from the other priests]
Father Ted: Not a popular one, Joe. Father Flynn, what did you write?
Father Flynn: I haven't written anything, because I'm not really good at that type of thing. But I did a drawing.
Father Ted: Right, well, can we have a look?
[Flynn reveals the drawing; it shows himself naked from behind, while walking a dog]
Father Flynn: What do you think?
Father Ted: Well, er...
Father Flynn: It's me, in the nip, with a dog!
Father Ted: [bewildered] What... how... how does that help you win a parachute?
Father Flynn: What do you mean, parachute? I wasn't listening at the start, there. Why would I want a parachute?
Father Ted: The plane's in trouble, and there's a competition to see who gets a parachute.
Father Flynn: Ohh... [sits down, looking shellshocked]
Father Ted: Okay, er, Father Jack, you next. [there is no response. The priests look around, but Jack is nowhere in sight] Father Jack? Where's Father Jack?
Pilot: The parachutes! The parachutes have gone!
[we see Father Jack, standing at one of the aeroplane's doors; he has one of the parachutes for himself, and has strapped the other to the drinks trolley. He pushes the trolley out, then follows it]
Father Jack: [echoing] DRIIIIIIIIIIIIINK!
Father Ted: Father Cave, do you want to go first?
Father Cave: I haven't written this down, because this comes from the heart. Father Gallagher, I've known you and been your friend for many years. And I think it's important to say, I love you. I love you more than anyone I've ever loved! I don't want the parachute, give it to him! [sits down and bursts into tears, while the other priests look taken aback]
Father Ted: R-right, well done, Father Cave. Father Fay?
[Fay stands up, clears his throat, then yells monkey-style gibberish while waving his arms around. The other priests look awed and clap admiringly]
Father Ted: Well, beat that! Joe?
Father Joe Briefly: I think I should get the parachute because I'm great. In fact, I think I should get both the parachutes, in case one of them doesn't work! [disapproving grumbles from the other priests]
Father Ted: Not a popular one, Joe. Father Flynn, what did you write?
Father Flynn: I haven't written anything, because I'm not really good at that type of thing. But I did a drawing.
Father Ted: Right, well, can we have a look?
[Flynn reveals the drawing; it shows himself naked from behind, while walking a dog]
Father Flynn: What do you think?
Father Ted: Well, er...
Father Flynn: It's me, in the nip, with a dog!
Father Ted: [bewildered] What... how... how does that help you win a parachute?
Father Flynn: What do you mean, parachute? I wasn't listening at the start, there. Why would I want a parachute?
Father Ted: The plane's in trouble, and there's a competition to see who gets a parachute.
Father Flynn: Ohh... [sits down, looking shellshocked]
Father Ted: Okay, er, Father Jack, you next. [there is no response. The priests look around, but Jack is nowhere in sight] Father Jack? Where's Father Jack?
Pilot: The parachutes! The parachutes have gone!
[we see Father Jack, standing at one of the aeroplane's doors; he has one of the parachutes for himself, and has strapped the other to the drinks trolley. He pushes the trolley out, then follows it]
Father Jack: [echoing] DRIIIIIIIIIIIIINK!
[the priests are holding a competition to find out who should get the two parachutes on the plane]
Father Ted : Father Cave, do you want to go first?
Father Cave : I haven't written this down, because this comes from the heart. Father Gallagher, I've known you and been your friend for many years. And I think it's important to say, I love you. I love you more than anyone I've ever loved! I don't want the parachute, give it to him! [sits down and bursts into tears, while the other priests look taken aback]
Father Ted : R-right, well done, Father Cave. Father Fay?
[Fay stands up, clears his throat, then yells monkey-style gibberish while waving his arms around. The other priests look awed and clap admiringly]
Father Ted : Well, beat that! Joe?
Father Joe Briefly : I think I should get the parachute because I'm great. In fact, I think I should get both the parachutes, in case one of them doesn't work! [disapproving grumbles from the other priests]
Father Ted : Not a popular one, Joe. Father Flynn, what did you write?
Father Flynn : I haven't written anything, because I'm not really good at that type of thing. But I did a drawing.
Father Ted : Right, well, can we have a look?
[Flynn reveals the drawing; it shows himself naked from behind, while walking a dog]
Father Flynn : What do you think?
Father Ted : Well, er...
Father Flynn : It's me, in the nip, with a dog!
Father Ted : [bewildered] What... how... how does that help you win a parachute?
Father Flynn : What do you mean, parachute? I wasn't listening at the start, there. Why would I want a parachute?
Father Ted : The plane's in trouble, and there's a competition to see who gets a parachute.
Father Flynn : Ohh... [sits down, looking shellshocked]
Father Ted : Okay, er, Father Jack, you next. [there is no response. The priests look around, but Jack is nowhere in sight] Father Jack? Where's Father Jack?
Pilot : The parachutes! The parachutes have gone!
[we see Father Jack, standing at one of the aeroplane's doors; he has one of the parachutes for himself, and has strapped the other to the drinks trolley. He pushes the trolley out, then follows it]
Father Jack : [echoing] DRIIIIIIIIIIIIINK!
http://www.tv-quotes.com/shows/father-ted/quote_20739.html
